Cures for Small Business Inferiority Feelings
Published: Aug 18, 2005
Is someone stealing your entrepreneurial energy and enthusiasm by trying to make you feel inferior? Operating a small business is challenging enough without losing any of our drive.
As individuals, we need social approval. We tend to feel inferior when people threaten to remove or diminish that approval.
Some bureaucrats put us down or act superior. Most business bullies are unaware when they are attacking the self-esteem of a small business operator. Mere representatives of a power authority will
try to belittle successful entrepreneurs. There are people who do not appreciate the superior skills required to manage a successful small operation.
These derisive forces can be managed.
The first step is to recognize some symptoms coming from persons who are:
- designated some authority with very little discretionary power entrusted to them
- obsessed with their own personal insecurities
- lacking competency or permission to negotiate a reasonable arrangement
- bound by strict regulations
- supervised by an overbearing boss
- predisposed to acting superior during most interactions with others
- reflecting the accepted behavior of their organization's culture
A small business owner/manager is wise to acquire some antidotes and defense mechanisms to avoid being made to feel inferior.
Prevent and Defend with some of these tactics.
- Replace the word "small" with "independent" when describing your business.
- Frequently repeat to yourself all your accomplishments, battles won and the lessons learned from the ones you lost, handicaps overcome, major crises survived, etc. This is not unlike that old
trick of imagining an overbearing person standing naked in front of you.
- Remind yourself and others of your multi-functional acrobatics performed in accounting, budgeting, marketing, negotiating, problem solving, conflict resolving and other functions requiring
intelligence and expertise.
- Be well prepared by frequently rehearsing your list of rebuttals and "defusers." Questions are most effective.
- Occasionally interject truthful statements that imply slightly exaggerated facts or status. For instance, if your wife and children help out in your business,
refer to them as staff members and imply sub-contractors are regular staff. Take care to avoid embarrassment from challenges.
- Have you ever visited an office where a short person has his or her chair cranked high while your chair is lower with a backward slanting back that makes you feel you're slouched in a bean-bag?
Whenever I encounter this situation, I remain standing and win far more often than I lose. Instead of leveling the playing field you lift yourself to higher ground. When challenged to sit down,
ask if the positioning is fair.
- Seek out the true source of power because the people who do hold the strings of power usually have huge responsibilities for preserving public trust and delegate the details to representatives.
They are your best persons to resolve an impasse. Even their power could be undermined. Since they are highly experienced in wiggling off the hook, teach yourself to become a skillful angler
because it's fun reeling in the big ones.
- When you sense a situation is appropriate or you want to have fun experimenting with some ploys for determining maximum effectiveness, go for it. Try saying things like, "I'm just a mischievous
little guy with a big mouth" (hidden threat of public exposure or whistle blowing) or, "I'm not intending to go public," of "I'm not planing to complain to your boss." While you are saying you
are not going to do something, you have implied it is a possible action for which you control the deferment. I have used a little humor for easing adversarial tension by saying, "Do you know who
I am?" When they questioningly reply, "No?" I declare with a sigh of relief, "Thank God for that!"
- Recall the film, The American President (1995), with Michael Douglas acting as President Andrew Shepherd. His opponent ended each attack by saying he was running for President. Finally,
Michael's character lashed out with, "... and I am the President!" If your small business is incorporated, you can rehearse delivering that line with the same authority.
- While you're learning to act, practice being very indignant which is partly true if you are feeling slighted.
- Fifty-five years ago, Stephen Potter wrote some humorous little books on Gamesmanship and One-upmanship. The underlying principles and tactics remain pertinent to this day. Many contemporary
books on negotiating offer tips for avoiding an inferior position.
- Put the day's "teapot tempest" into perspective. At least, in your own mind. This helps you to not feel inferior.
Make your objective to prevent being made to feel inferior. Make your goal to be a happy and successful leader. Counterattack with humility to avoid placing yourself in an embarrassing position by
overplaying your hand.
Convince yourself you are a Captain of Industry. Regardless of the size of your operation, your role is to manage, influence and control the forces around you and your domain. Feeling inferior doesn't help.
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