Shyness is a Losing Trait

Published: Jan 20, 2006

Application

Someone declared, "Modesty has damaged many a liver."

Likewise, shyness damages your business and your reputation as a successful business person.

Another saying is, "Smile and the world smiles with you - frown and do it alone." That's probably adapted from, "Snore and you sleep alone."

You don't need to have a pushy in-your-face personality. Rather, be friendly, welcoming and forthright.

Exercises for overcoming shyness

Learn to say your name clearly. Most people mumble their name which requires repeating if anyone is interested. Practice enunciating each syllable in front of the mirror while flashing your best smile.
If it's true that you're responsible for your face after 40, you'll need to practice smiling early and often.
Match your posture to the vibrancy in your face.
Create and practice your elevator speech. Imagine meeting someone at the main floor of an elevator who asks, "What are you doing these days?" Answer the five Ws (who, what, where, when and why) before you get off at the third floor.
Create and memorize a repertoire of responses that makes people feel good including yourself.
Extend this behavior beyond networking events to every person you meet.

You'll be pleased how much this improves your self-esteem and your business networking.

Stories

A Cascading Wave of Good Will

The real Uncle Max, who inspired the creation of these pages, was not shy.

Early in my business career and during a visit to his city, I met him as he left his office to join him for dinner in his suburban home. We traveled through a crowded subway, a bus and visited a convenience store in this city renowned for its inhospitality to strangers. Uncle Max magically transformed strangers from their protective gloomy masks to bursting rays of sunshine. My own transformation resulted from my resolve to emulate him for the rest of my days.

Submitted by: Nephew Gerry

Outcomes

Be transformed from being ignored and forgotten to a memorable ray of sunshine.
Improve your people skills while enhancing your self esteem.
Change from a fading wallflower to being the ray of sunshine that stimulates ontogenesis in others.